It is time for me to confess
I have denied it ever since I was a kid, but I can no longer live like this. At 55 it is time to be open and honest about it. When I became a Christian at age 16, I thought that was the way to deal with this and I prayed hard and tried for 30-some years and then I was just realizing, I am still that way. I know I am. And I just reached a place where I cannot take it anymore — when I was going through all this darkness, I thought, "Just end this."
To be guilty of something that the Bible calls an abomination 4 times in 3 consecutive verses surely must make me the worst of the worse. I really don't know if I was born this way or perhaps something just makes me choose this thing. Maybe it is rooted in some need to rebel against God.
If people really knew who I was, that what I have done is an abomination, I would never be accepted.
Even though I rarely engage in it (I mostly try to tamp down the desire), I know in my heart what I really am. It is like I have two identities, one which people see and find acceptable and one which is a terrible abomination before the God who never changes, the one who says that not one jot or title shall pass from the law until all is fulfilled.
Despite being happily married for over 30 years and having children and grandchildren there were occasions in which I faltered. I thought I hid it well. I didn’t know people could see what I was going through, the darkness and the struggle. After I confessed my abomination to my family, my daughter said she was afraid to walk in my bedroom or kitchen because she was afraid she’d find me — that I’d done something to myself. And I didn’t even know they’d picked it up.
My family’s reaction took time, but the bottom line was they loved me and they still love me … it’s been an amazing journey of acceptance on their part … I was offered support and love from each member of my family, including my wife.
So now I must confess not only to my family but to all, all those who have read my blog posts and thought I was a citizen in good standing in the Kingdom of God. Though I may be an abomination in God's sight I pray for your forgiveness and understanding.
I am guilty of a quadruple abomination. Leviticus 11:10 And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:
11 They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcasses in abomination.
12 Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you.
I admit it! I love lobster and crab and clams and oysters. I have even eaten sea urchin! I have dined at the temple of the Red Lobster (more then once)!
I am guilty of the sin that has two more abominations in Leviticus then even homosexuality! Oh that my sin were just one abomination less! Perhaps then I could find some minor role to fulfill in religion.
If only something has changed between God and man. If only we were not bound to law, if only there was such a thing as a new covenant or grace! If only the law had been fulfilled!
Luke 24:44 And he said unto them, These are the words which I spake unto you, while I was yet with you, that all things must be fulfilled, which were written in the law of Moses, and in the prophets, and in the psalms, concerning me.
O joy of joys, the law of Moses is fulfilled! There is a new covenant, the old is passed away. Pass the butter and let the shell cracking commence!
John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
After we have mastered loving one another perhaps we will have time to worry about lesser things. Lets give it a couple hundred years or so first though.
Comments:
Ashley L - Those who defend, promote and live the lobster eating lifestyles have exchanged the truth of God for a lie. Many claim it's genetic or natural, so they expect others to accept this "alternative" lifestyle. But the truth is that God calls lobster eating sin, and with his help you always have a choice of whether or not to live in your sin
Angel H - God's rules are black and white. There is no gray area. My heart breaks for you, and you will be in my continuous prayers.
George T - Of course God loves the lobster eater that is not the question or the issue at hand. The issue is, is lobster eating behavior a sin? According to the Bible it is a sin. The lobster eater must also apply biblical truth to his life and remain pure and not eat lobster- according to the Bible. These are God's standards and not ours. We don't make the "rules", we just apply them to our lives. It is arrogant to thing we know better than a loving AND just God.
Sandra R - I have been listening to you since I was a young girl. You are an incredibly talented man. I'm sad to hear about how you struggled with lobster eating for so long. I love you, but I don't love your lobster eating lifestyle-the Bible clearly states lobster eating is a sin. I can't judge you, NONE of us can-we all deal with sinful urges on a daily basis. The best I could do is lift you up in prayer. Please cancel our buffet plans for next Sunday with your family.
Special thanks to Christianity Today for its article on Ray Boltz.
http://blog.christianitytoday.com/ctliveblog/archives/2008/09/ray_b...
To be guilty of something that the Bible calls an abomination 4 times in 3 consecutive verses surely must make me the worst of the worse. I really don't know if I was born this way or perhaps something just makes me choose this thing. Maybe it is rooted in some need to rebel against God.
If people really knew who I was, that what I have done is an abomination, I would never be accepted.
Even though I rarely engage in it (I mostly try to tamp down the desire), I know in my heart what I really am. It is like I have two identities, one which people see and find acceptable and one which is a terrible abomination before the God who never changes, the one who says that not one jot or title shall pass from the law until all is fulfilled.
Despite being happily married for over 30 years and having children and grandchildren there were occasions in which I faltered. I thought I hid it well. I didn’t know people could see what I was going through, the darkness and the struggle. After I confessed my abomination to my family, my daughter said she was afraid to walk in my bedroom or kitchen because she was afraid she’d find me — that I’d done something to myself. And I didn’t even know they’d picked it up.
My family’s reaction took time, but the bottom line was they loved me and they still love me … it’s been an amazing journey of acceptance on their part … I was offered support and love from each member of my family, including my wife.
So now I must confess not only to my family but to all, all those who have read my blog posts and thought I was a citizen in good standing in the Kingdom of God. Though I may be an abomination in God's sight I pray for your forgiveness and understanding.
I am guilty of a quadruple abomination. Leviticus 11:10 And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:
11 They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcasses in abomination.
12 Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you.
I admit it! I love lobster and crab and clams and oysters. I have even eaten sea urchin! I have dined at the temple of the Red Lobster (more then once)!
I am guilty of the sin that has two more abominations in Leviticus then even homosexuality! Oh that my sin were just one abomination less! Perhaps then I could find some minor role to fulfill in religion.
If only something has changed between God and man. If only we were not bound to law, if only there was such a thing as a new covenant or grace! If only the law had been fulfilled!
Luke 24:44 And he said unto them, These are the words which I spake unto you, while I was yet with you, that all things must be fulfilled, which were written in the law of Moses, and in the prophets, and in the psalms, concerning me.
O joy of joys, the law of Moses is fulfilled! There is a new covenant, the old is passed away. Pass the butter and let the shell cracking commence!
John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
After we have mastered loving one another perhaps we will have time to worry about lesser things. Lets give it a couple hundred years or so first though.
Comments:
Ashley L - Those who defend, promote and live the lobster eating lifestyles have exchanged the truth of God for a lie. Many claim it's genetic or natural, so they expect others to accept this "alternative" lifestyle. But the truth is that God calls lobster eating sin, and with his help you always have a choice of whether or not to live in your sin
Angel H - God's rules are black and white. There is no gray area. My heart breaks for you, and you will be in my continuous prayers.
George T - Of course God loves the lobster eater that is not the question or the issue at hand. The issue is, is lobster eating behavior a sin? According to the Bible it is a sin. The lobster eater must also apply biblical truth to his life and remain pure and not eat lobster- according to the Bible. These are God's standards and not ours. We don't make the "rules", we just apply them to our lives. It is arrogant to thing we know better than a loving AND just God.
Sandra R - I have been listening to you since I was a young girl. You are an incredibly talented man. I'm sad to hear about how you struggled with lobster eating for so long. I love you, but I don't love your lobster eating lifestyle-the Bible clearly states lobster eating is a sin. I can't judge you, NONE of us can-we all deal with sinful urges on a daily basis. The best I could do is lift you up in prayer. Please cancel our buffet plans for next Sunday with your family.
Special thanks to Christianity Today for its article on Ray Boltz.
http://blog.christianitytoday.com/ctliveblog/archives/2008/09/ray_b...
Views: 5
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Lahry Sibley on -
This article is an abomination. DON'T PLAY WITH YAHWEH AND HIS HOLY GRACE!
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Permalink Reply by Dena Brehm on -
Ohhhhhhhhh, Bob ... knowing you, I *knew* there was a punch line, but wasn't sure which of the abominations you were going to use as your example...!
There are so many (as well the many prohibitions and sins) ... Jews eating with Gentiles ... wearing more than one blend of fabric ... women daring to menstruate "within the camp" ... shaving the beard, cutting the hair ... eating birds that creep on all fours (is there such a thing?!? maybe we shouldn't eat unicorns either, just to be safe!) ... eating meat less than well-done ... charging interest (or loaning at all) ... and refusing to stone disobedient children ...
Brilliant job, Bob...!
(and your youtube is making the rounds, too ... got two emails just this week, LOL!)
Shalom, Dena
P.S. (& Lahry ... did you miss the point...?)
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Permalink Reply by Tom LeCompte on -
A tongue in cheek attempt to excuse the sin of homosexuality?
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Permalink Reply by Bob Harkema on -
No, it was a tongue in cheek attempt to show the silliness (and destruction) of trying to live by the old covenant in the age of the new covenant. When our focus becomes the sin in others rather than Jesus in us we cease to exhibit the very grace that we ourselves were given.
Tom LeCompte said:A tongue in cheek attempt to excuse the sin of homosexuality?
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Permalink Reply by Dena Brehm on
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What about the sin of religious pride ... the only sin Jesus came down upon, I notice...
Funny, the things in others we point at, and attack, while ignoring the logs in our own eyes ... the blind spots that cause far more damage from within ... (very much including myself in this log-examination).
Shalom, Dena
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Permalink Reply by Bob Harkema on
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From a friend:
Mixing the law and grace is such a serious deviance from the gospel, that it makes one spiritually shipwrecked in their faith. When we try to live under even a single part of the law, we are under a curse. Believers who live like this, functionally loose connection with The Head (Christ). As a result, these preachers and their followers are no longer eating from the tree of Life, but merely from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.
Moralistic righteousness when spoken by legalistic believers and teachers sounds good to the ear and mind, but leaves you with heaviness in your spirit. We are literally righteous in Christ, we have the mind of Christ, and enjoy the awesome experience of Jesus thinking His very thoughts through us!
Dena Brehm said:What about the sin of religious pride ... the only sin Jesus came down upon, I notice...
Funny, the things in others we point at, and attack, while ignoring the logs in our own eyes ... the blind spots that cause far more damage from within ... (very much including myself in this log-examination).
Shalom, Dena
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Permalink Reply by Dena Brehm on
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Amen to you and your friend, Bob...!
I notice that the prophetic voice never supports status quo ...
Shalom, Dena
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Permalink Reply by Bob Harkema on
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I think you may have mixed up Mosaic law and civil law, but maybe that was your intent?
There actually isn't a line to step across, it's really two lines, they formed a cross. Fortunately Jesus hung upon that cross for us, and not us only but for the whole world...lobster eaters included.
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Permalink Reply by Ching Alkuino on -
Rick that's so funny. Is that a song? Very well written. You should win the contest (lol).
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Permalink Reply by Sandy McCoy- Foust on -
Rick, I don't believe Bob was justifying what Ray did or has chosen to do....but saying get the log outta your own eye...work out your OWN salvation....instead of putting yourself above with your puffed up pride...(before the fall comes). I doubt if the fiddle will ever sound right with the banjo...in your mindset....May the Lord show you TRUTH!.......You see, ....NOTHING you say here matters if theres not LOVE.....All I see is judgment and sarcasm....sounds real Christlike :o( Living by GRACE does not give you a license to sin...it frees you to LOVE, forgive and trust God with our brothers and sisters...something people who are bound by LAW can't seem to do....so sad....
Rick Knock said:Ha! Thanks, Ching, but I don't think I'm gonna win. It sounds like Bob thinks I maybe busted up some laws & put them back together into some kind of civil mosaic or something. But I'm not even that kind of artist. I just want to get the fiddle part to sound right with the banjo... :D
Ching Alkuino said:Rick that's so funny. Is that a song? Very well written. You should win the contest (lol).
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Permalink Reply by Dena Brehm on
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Oh this reminds me of last year ...! ;)
Rick, Sandy doesn't know you yet ... and she's reacting much like I did, when I first encountered your playful side, without benefit of the context of your good-hearted nature. Let her get to know you, the way you let me know you ... and THEN the humor is appreciated as your finely-honed gift ... rather than misunderstood.
Sandy -- Rick is a kind and gracious man ... it took me a while to see that, but when I did, it transformed my perspective of everything he writes.
Knowing Bob first-hand (as in breathing the same air in my living room), and knowing Rick online, after working through some hard misunderstandings, I'd warrant a strong guess that you two dudes would greatly enjoy each other ... you both have a similar sense of humor ... at this point, you'll just have to trust me on this.
You BOTH know how to love -- and in the same way. I've experienced both of your hearts ... whole lotta good there!!!
I think you're all three wondermous people!
Shalom, Dena
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Permalink Reply by Bob Harkema on
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Rick,
You are correct, I know even less about effectively loving than I do about keeping some of the laws of Moses. But I do know the source of love, I know the One who is defined by it, I trust the One who invented it. While I fail at delivering it on a daily basis, I always know that that He will never stop loving me. Perhaps others are called to be ecclesiastical hall monitors and doctrine police but I am not, I am called to love. I know I will never be very good at, but the author of love lives in me and that has got to help some real love leak out at least once in a while.
Bob
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