Mardee Fried's Page

This particular story begins with a Revelation from the Experiencing God Study by Henry Blackaby. Granted the Revelation really started with God but the study was the catalyst for my new discoveries.

For as long as I can remember, at least back to the 80's (not that I can't remember beyond then) I have been troubled by the fact that the Church model didn't mimic the Bible's depiction of what the Church was truly supposed to be (1st Century Church). For years this discrepancy nagged at me, but I didn't know exactly what to do about it. At this point in time there was no Goggling your way to an answer so like most people I just went with the flow and muddled through the best I knew how.

I was saved in the winter of 1980 or at least that's the best guess I have come up with; it's hard to say exactly because until January 2003 when I "re-dedicated" my life to Christ I was stoned on pot virtually every day. I know many would argue that I wasn't saved in 1980 and whether I was or not, only God knows for sure, but I did have an experience that makes me believe that I was saved that day.

The experience went something like this... I was in Idaho Falls, CO. with a houseful of Hippies, holding hands in a circle and repeating after the guy saying all the words... I invited Jesus into my heart and as I finished repeating all the words there was a gurgling, bubbling geyser erupting in the region of my solar plexus, I actually thought I may vomit, as I described the sensation to the group I was told that it was the steam of living waters cleansing my soul. Again that is what I remember, but it sounded plausible to me because I knew absolutely nothing about Jesus. Up to that point I had been to Vacation Bible School, had a memorable encounter going to my Grandma Millie’s Pentecostal Church. (a full-fledged tongue speaking rolling in the aisles Spirit Filled Church) (Thank you Jesus!) Thank God for Millie Padgett - she literally prayed my family into the kingdom.

My Dad was in the Air Force and although we didn't grow up in Church I knew I was a Protestant because it was on all the documentation. There were several things that happened (acts of God) in my youth that got me to where I am today (not excluding God’s grace). The first thing was that when I was 5 or 6 I would lay in my dark bedroom terrified that I was going to be attacked by something or someone. I would tell my Mom how scared I was and she said to me night after night "all you have to do is say these words", "do you confess that Jesus Christ comes in the flesh". l memorized those words and it wasn't until many, many years later that I found the words of scripture in the Bible. I thought it was just something she made up to sooth and appease me at the time.

I have questioned time and time again how my Mom a woman with seemingly little to no background in the Word of God would know to tell her child to recite those words. Maybe my Grandma Millie told her, I don't guess I will ever know because both Millie and Reina my Mom are in heaven.

The situation with my Mom is an odd one because she died when I was 15 in a car crash so I never truly knew what her theology was. She taught vacation Bible School for a few years when I was a kid and we were (sprinkle) baptized by a woman preacher who smoked Chesterfields and told people their futures. Needless to say it's a bit confusing.

Those were the early years; allow me to fast forward to the 90's... I went to Church at Trinity Church International in Lake Worth, Florida for a couple of years. Who knows what happens to alter your view or perception of a Church, maybe I was tired of "being good" or maybe the Pastor sending out a message in the Church bulletin alerting everyone to the dress code appropriate for Church had something to do with it. Or maybe after tithing for two years and then needing some assistance with an electric bill there was nothing. My disappointment in the Church was great enough to keep me away for the next 15 years.

January 2003 I was lying in bed and I rolled over on my side and simply said, "Lord, I can't do it anymore". That was it, no more no less; I shed a few tears and went to sleep. It's amazing that those few words turned my life and world around. I called my sister Debbie who lived 25 miles away in Leavenworth, KS whom I had seen twice in the two years her husband was stationed there. It's odd that God would have me turn to her because at this point in time she really didn't want to deal with me. She had every right not to but God really had moved me to call her and ask her to let me go to Church with her and her family. Well I can't say how much time went by a couple of months I think and several repeated requests before she took me seriously. I know in retrospect it was a lesson for both of us, because of her reluctance the Lord showed her some things, and used those things to grow what is now an awesome and very close relationship.

So we finally get to the River of Life Church in Kansas City, MO and during the alter call I gave my life back to God. There was no hesitation on my part, I leaped from my seat and was in front of Pastor Phil in moments. I laid everything I knew would hinder my relationship with God and the Holy Spirit on the alter that night. I knew in my heart it was time to put childish things behind me. I knew that my pot smoking days, deviant sex, and cigarette smoking were all things I wanted to be free of. And this time I wanted them out of my way to make room for the Holy Spirit to give Him complete reign over my life, heart and mind. There was no more doing it my way left in me. I had fought with my flesh for so long and the only way I had any inkling into beating it was to come into obedience under the headship of Christ and the guidance and wisdom of the Holy Spirit. OK that last few sentences were much more recent revelation.

So that leads me back to where I am today. As I said in the beginning I am doing the Experiencing God Bible Study and in Chapter 10, which I glanced over initially and formed a negative opinion of, but, was prompted by the Holy Spirit to take this chapter very seriously. In my mind it was not possible for there to be anything wrong or missing at my Church... I love Pastor Robert, he's a great anointed teacher but after reading more and more of the chapter the questions that Henry was asking stirred in my heart. The building, the fellowship, the tithe, the communion, all of these things started to resonate in my heart and I had to address the questions with honest answers.

There is no fellowship at my Church. I have one friend after three years, one!!! I am thankful for her (Hazel) but one friend after three years, come on. From my Life Group there is Mark and Bonnie, Bob and Lyn, Jeff and Amy and Ray and me from the initial group. And although I love them deeply I have never been to visit with any of them, or, them with me outside of our Life Group. The only reason that holds any relevance is because I now know that it was supposed to be so much more, maybe not this Life Group but the next Life Group, Home Church, Simple Church or Organic or House Church.

Isn’t God amazing! I almost bypassed the most significant chapter in the workbook. If it were not for God and His grace I would have missed the most important message of my life. The reason I almost blew it off is because I had just gotten back from a Medical Missions trip to Guatemala and the lesson was the one I missed while on the trip. However my Life Group which typically meets every other Friday changed the schedule due to upcoming events at our Church (Gateway Church in Southlake, TX).

I have been attending this Life Group for several years and it has gone through some changes but there are still some of us from the core group that have been pretty faithful in attending the group. I think we agree that we have seen God working towards something great; we have had many revelations in our group, some more than others and some revelations stronger than others. As for me, this group and study have enlightened me to the fact that life is about relationship. It is about relationship with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit and it's about relationship with God's people/children. I have to say, as fundamental as that may sound I just recently got it.

During my last Life Group meeting while discussing Chapter 10 the leader of our group said something profound. He said the words Home Church! It was like a light bulb and immediately I had so many questions, I asked Mark if there was such a thing? He didn't know and we agreed that we could Google it. Can you imagine the very thing I have longed for may actually exist. I went home that night and went to bed but the next morning I was all over the internet. I started with a Google search of Home Church which lead to House Church, which lead to Simple and Organic Church. I knew the plan God had for my life was unfolding right before my very eyes. Everything I had read in the Bible about the Church was actually taking place today, right now, in people’s homes all over the world. I'm sure you can imagine my elation; my time of revelation from the Holy Spirit has finally come to fruition.

Besides Experiencing God there are a few other books that started me down this path over the past year. Frances Chan’s, Crazy Love, The Shack, Destined to Reign by Joseph Prince and parts of the Left Behind series. Currently I am reading Frank Viola's book Reimagining Church, The Forgotten Ways by Alan Hirsch and So you don’t want to go to Church Anymore… I want to know what everyone’s thoughts are and see what I need in my next Church. I have drawn some specific examples of what I think Church should be and what form it should take. I prayed about it and the Lord shared the most insightful information with me. He said today (4/9/2010) and I quote: “Church planting of the Simple Organic Church is in its infancy, and my people think it takes all this preparation, but it doesn’t – it takes a willing and obedient heart! The Holy Spirit will always guide the way; all my people have to do is ask. Pray and ask, seek and knock – they know, but they try to over complicate, and over think everything. The truth is they need to pray and ask me to bring their Church family together, and collectively pray and invite the Holy Spirit to lead them. Really besides the group planning and preparing meals everything else the Holy Spirit will provide.”

The Lord and I share a dialog every day and that is what he shared with me today. I believe it; His words resonate true in my Spirit.

Well that’s about it for now… There was so much more that has happened along the way, so many insights and miracles that would fill volumes.

I am currently living in the Dallas/Fort Worth TX area but will be moving to Colorado Springs CO, where my sister Debbie, my Dad and my brother Hank and all their family lives. I am praying for my new Home Church and God’s will for me and my new church family. If God shares any wisdom or insight into where that is, with you, please don’t hesitate to email me…

In Him,

Mardee

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